How to deal with rejection and TRIUMPH!

So as some of you may be wondering why 3 years? Why not give up already? Why spend thousands of pounds auditioning and trying to improve when you haven't got in after all this time? Why are you wasting your time with such a hopeless dream?

Well yes 3 years is a very long time and yes I ask these questions to myself on a daily basis. Over the last two auditioning years I have been rejected around 20 times. YES 20! But through every rejection I have become stronger as a person and as a performer.

What is important to realize is that generally rejections for drama schools are not an inflection on you as a person but actually a second chance to improve. ( I know strange isn't it?)

Drama schools look for so many different qualities in a person .They may think your too young, you need more experience or they already have someone who fits into a similar casting as you. You cant put yourself down after getting rejected a few times. If you feel passionate about it you need to GO FOR IT! Too often in life we settle for what we think we can get easily rather than dreaming bigger and aiming higher for things that we want. And what is wrong with getting what you want when you put all the hard work, blood, sweat and tears into fulfilling your dreams?!

Nothing that's what!

I came to realize that rejection is to be embraced and understood. It is really the nature of the game, virtually every performer has to go through some form of rejection, there is too many of us for very few jobs (paid jobs) in this industry. And actually it gives you a much better understanding of how hard you have to work to get those jobs and too stay on top.

I guess in a sense rejection is the breaking and making of you as a person and as an artist (gospel preach!)

Trust me I've spent thousands of pounds paying my auditions buying plays, watching as much theatre as my eyes can absorb, training as much as I can and travelling all over the country for that YES or NO.  I've had some quite shockingly bad audition experiences. On my first ever audition I saw someone cross out my name as I was stood up performing at one particular drama school that I will not name. And YES I cried afterwards, and I was on the phone to my mum wailing like a baby talking to her about it all. And she simply said to me that the place wasn't for me and to keep working hard and accept the good and bad whenever they come. Those simple suggestions really sunk into me and helped me so much (thanks mummy dearest).

So how to do I deal with rejection?

Well after I get that No I allow it to sink in and don't fear or try to deny my feelings about it. I feel like it is important to release the emotional side of a rejection. Otherwise it just builds up inside and you start turning quite jaded and cynical about the experience. And then the first thing that pops into my mind is what!

What do I need to do to improve on my performance? What help can I get from others to improve? What do I think are the reasons I got rejected (be careful not to over think that one to much) What can I learn from that experience. What will I do better next time?

I feel like it is important to give myself these open ended questions not only does it allow me to start thinking back on track, but it also allows me to convert those negative thoughts and feelings about myself and to be honest the drama school. Into more positive constructive thoughts.

The second thing that pops into my head is how!

How can I achieve this? How can I do better? How can I prepare for my next audition? How can I find the help I need to get myself back on track? How can I learn from the previous rejection?

This allows me to accept and importantly move on from the past and push on into the next step.

Yes rejections are hard to deal with but the success that you can achieve is all up to you.

Lets begin at the Start

Hello Peeps ( I say that quite a lot) so I felt it was about time to start blogging about my drama school experience. After reading drama school blogs through the years and being inspired by peoples courage and tenacity to not only write a blog, but also to go out there year after year and audition.

Auditioning for drama schools is the one of the most daunting, exhilaration and challenging experiences of certainly my life. And this year I thought I would  share the roller coaster ride with you peeps. I'm fundamentally writing this blog to give my screaming sub-conscious a voice (and man is it screaming). If no-one reads this apart from me, it doesn't concern me to much its always good to let things out sometimes, even if it is too myself ( Im so lonely...)

Anyway stay on track... So about me, well I am going into my 3rd year of auditioning for drama schools. Yes 3 years. A long time to be waiting and questioning ones self (can you actually act Che?!). Last year I was shortlisted for Bristol Old Vic and LAMDA for the 3 year course at both places. Unfortunately as you may have guessed already I wasn't accepted. However rather than dwell in my own self pity and eat a tonne of mars bars. I decided do something about it. And so I moved from Cardiff where I come from to London and really just started to develop, practice and most importantly LIVE!!!

It was a huge decision to move to London completely independently at the age of 19, not just because of my age but also to do with the fact that London can be a very lonely place if you are by yourself. Which is partly why I'm writing this blog. I've definitely had my fair share of ups and downs since moving in September. Finding a place to live when your 19, unemployed, not in full time education and you barely have any money was certainly not a fun experience. (finding a room share in London was almost as daunting as drama school auditions!) But now I can say that things are starting to pay off. I currently work full time as a waiter in Chelsea (so cliché I know). Also I am currently studying in a part time foundation course in Artsed which is really incredible and I feel like I'm learning a lot. Juggling those two things and trying to enjoy London and all its wonders (some not so wonderful wonders) can be tricky but it's all worth it.

So now I feel ready to start.. ready to start getting my shiz together... READY TO CONQUER THE WORLD (not quite, calm down Ché gosh!) It's that time of the year again that every drama school hopeful gets excited and nervous about. AND no its not visiting the Santa's Grotto at Westfield shopping centre.

It's the start of drama school audition season.

Oh yeah its probably a good time to start learning my monologues... It's kinda important I think...